| myspace |
[16 May 2006|06:27pm] |
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mood |
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 curious |
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Norther - Blackhearted |
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if any of you lj-ers have a myspace, come check mine out.
i hardly update this anymore.
http://www.myspace.com/rawkxgrrl
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| hii |
[10 Nov 2005|11:51am] |
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mood |
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 okay |
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i haven't been updating my journal in awhiiiiiile!
does anybody still read this??
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| wtf am i doing to myself? |
[02 Oct 2004|03:02am] |
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 depressed |
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i did a bad, bad thing today again. i'm not proud of it. im so depressed and lonely right now. i want to talk to somebody, but i don't want to wake anybody up. i feel like crying.. the feeling only lasts for awhile, but when it's gone.. boom you feel shitty all over again. i miss daniel. i want to talk to him.. i hate letting people who genuinely care about me down. i guess im just my worst enemy. and you know what's really sad? that im already planning on doing this again later tonight. i will probably get to see daniel then. i think i need to go out and get a breath of fresh air. as of now, i guess there's really nothing else to say. i will update later when i'm not feeling like an emotional wreck. i really dont feel so good now. im scared.
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| where have you been? |
[20 Sep 2004|03:11am] |
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mood |
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 melancholy |
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music |
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Hellogoodbye - Call and Return |
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I've been tossing and turning in bed. I can't sleep. I hate the fact that the last time I talked to Daniel was last Friday night/Sat morning.
Friday night was hella fun. Hung out with my sweetie, Rolando, Michelle, and Albert. We got soo wasted. [Wish you could have stayed Maribel.] Stayed at Rolando's then drove around the strip and spent the night at Daniel's. Everything in the wee hours seem to be a blur. Good times<3
Oh, and I lost my damn purse! Grr.. why the eff does this shit have to happen to me?!
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[06 Sep 2004|09:26pm] |
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mood |
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 good |
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music |
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The Bled - Nothing We Say Leaves This Room |
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Yesterday, I hung out with Maribel, Brady, Daniel, Sylvia, Rolando, Abel, and Abe. We went to a party [minus maribel + brady]. It was cool until the cops came.
Highlights:
-playing the drums.
-"Harmon, nigga."
- getting lost.
- talked to Anthony who I hadn't seen in a long time.
- making out in the backseat.
- listening to The Cure.
- peeing in the back of Walmart.
- waking up next to Daniel.
Haha, what fun.
Talked to Albert today.. we're cool now. Im happy.<3
My sister and I are not, but what's new.
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| guess who's back? |
[03 Sep 2004|12:17am] |
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mood |
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migraine |
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music |
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Trivium - If I Could Collapse The Masses |
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Long time, no update.. it's been more than a month. Let's see where to start..
I did go to the Bleeding Through show. I met them and they're all so sweet.<3 Sylvia, Damaris, Patrick, Fabian, Rolando, and my boyfriend Daniel were there with me. Good times.
I also went to As I Lay Dying/Himsa/Remembering Never with the same crew minus Demi. That was a damn good show! Sylvia and I met Johnny Pettibone.. wOOt! Saw Leena, Crystal, and Michelle. I miss them already.
Daniel got his car!! Who's happy?!? Yep..I get to see him more often!<333
Watched The Exorcist.. it was good. Daniel, Sylvia, Demi, Maribel, her bf Brady, and I piled in Daniel's SUV.
Our anniversary passed on August 25th. He got me rings..they're soo beautiful! They never leave my fingers. I love him to death.. I had a little "preggy" scare because of an accident that night. But no worries, Leena, Michelle, and I hit up Planned Parenthood and got me some pills.
I'm back in school. I should take my schoolwork more seriously if I want a future. And I get all the motivation I need from my sweetie.♥
Looking forward to The Bled/Senses Fail Oct. 8th and Bleeding Through/It Dies Today Oct. 29. Mark your calendar bitches.
That's about it.. I'll try to update more. I won't disappear. xo
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| missing you was always one more kiss. |
[24 Jul 2004|09:13pm] |
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mood |
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 guilty |
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music |
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Bleeding Through - On Wings Of Lead |
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I'm pushing him away. I feel like such a bad girlfriend. =/ I have the best boyfriend in the world... WTF is wrong with me?!
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| hey hey hey. |
[10 Jul 2004|06:19pm] |
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mood |
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 dirty |
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music |
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Velvet Revolver - Slither |
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I'm back. Let's see 4th of July, let me tell you illegal fireworks and Rachel's hair don't mix. ::shakes head::
Guess who had the most erotic 2 hours of her life last night? [sigh] I am bored and sore... But, I could go for more today. ;]
I went to the gym twice this week. Sucks I can't go more. I need to work off this sexual frustration.
I've been thinking about friends I haven't kept up with. It's sad that when there's that one guy in your life, all the rest seem to fall away.
I don't know what I am talking about..
Where's the sex, drugs, and rock 'n' roll?
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| .UPDATE. |
[29 Jun 2004|04:55am] |
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mood |
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 anxious |
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music |
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Horrorpops - Dotted With Hearts |
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I AM MOVING!
The new house [located at Owens + Christy] is just 5-10 minutes from my current place. So, I will not be updating this journal for a short while.
Things are good with me and Daniel. We always argue about who misses/loves each other more.
[I win.] ::grin::
And yeah, I am most def looking forward to 4th of July, Dimmu Borgir/Bleeding Through on 7/30, and Himsa/As I lay Dying 8/9.
=I'm out=
.xo.
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| my only love. |
[25 Jun 2004|04:29am] |
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mood |
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 loved |
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Daniel: "I miss you."
Rachel: "I miss you more."
Daniel: "I miss you x infinity. I win I said it first."
Rachel: "No..I miss you x infinity x infinity. Haha."
Love is when you let that person go and they come back to you.
August 25, 2001.. 1 year later, we were apart. And found our way back into each other's hearts June 22nd, 2004.
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| when they come for you. |
[23 Jun 2004|06:07am] |
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mood |
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 pissed off |
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Oh, boy. Lots of shit has happened..where to start..
Ok. I guess I 'll start off by saying Daniel [my ex of 1 year] and I got back together.*swooon* We have been seeing each other more often lately. I love him dearly.
Also, I got fucking ROBBED by some dick! He held a fucking gun to Daniel's back. Attempted to order my sister and I around. My sister is a tough 15 year old girl. She, along with me, refused to get on the ground and she was trying not to laugh at this incompetant fool. Looking back, I should have been scared, but I was too pissed off. He was calling us "bitches and hos", pulled out my hair, and pulled my bra strap and shirt down, my HIM purse was stolen from me along with my fucking wallet which has my identification card. We ran him down, but lost him. Ended up in the backseat of a police car to identify the fucking nigger. But, no luck. Thankfully, nobody was hurt.
WHAT A FUCKING NIGHT.
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| when im not around you. |
[16 Jun 2004|05:57pm] |
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mood |
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lonely |
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music |
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The Cranberries - I Miss You When You're Gone |
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It's times like these, I wish he was here...
I'm drinking my sorrows away. </3>
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| I'm back. |
[14 Jun 2004|01:44pm] |
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mood |
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okay |
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music |
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Motley Crue - Girls, Girls, Girls |
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So, yeah. It's been almost 2 weeks since I've updated. Whoa.. a lot of shit has happened. Not bad, per se.
I went to Valley on the last day of school. And met up with some people I hadn't seen in a while. Saw Damaris [I used to call her Denise haha], Albert, Rolando, Patrick [who I gave my number to keep in touch], and some others.
I've been talking to Rolando and he has a girlfriend. She's shorter than I am and cute. Rolando has been telling me about Daniel [my ex] and how he missed me. Daniel broke things off with Sylvia who I haven't seen since we got drunk way back. As a matter of fact, I saw him at Rolando's house Saturday night for the party. He looked good. And called him up last night to see what was going on with him. Things are going good. Also, saw Robert after the party.
Candace is supposed to be coming in to see me from Pahrump today. Shes a cool girl, but she will talk your ear off. [Calling everyfucking day to talk about my ex who also happens to be her ex.] I wish she would just back off about me and Daniel.
I did Maribel's hair and I did a pretty good job, if I say so myself. It's like mine with black on top and bleached/dyed burgundy underneath. I think I'm going to get my hair cut shaggy like David Bowie in 'The Labyrinth', sort of Elvira-ish, or Joan Jett. Kinda like the hair metal bands did in the late 80's. It should be cute.
On another note, my 2 stalker guys have finally fucking stopped calling. Damn, one of them went out with my old friend and the other I don't have a clue about. Sheez, talk about desperation. Anyways, I'm out to get all dolled up. Everyone should comment and say hi.<3
P.S. Nothing ever did happen with that metal guy and his little brown dog. I still see them around though.
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| Posting this before I never get around to it. |
[02 Jun 2004|12:56am] |
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mood |
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A7X - Eternal Rest |
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This past weekend was fun. Spent the night at Maribel's.
-Saw The Day After Tomorrow [Awesome movie! Mmm..Jake Gyllenhaal.]
-Maribel's bf's = shaved head, silly antics, and constant calls.
-Swooned over Johnny Depp.
-Watched The Labyrinth DVD.
-Maribel comes back from the dead talking in her sleep. With this girl, you will wake up in the middle of the night to find her legs wrapped around you for body heat.
-Monkeying around w/ whoopee cushion.
-Cracking up at silly hairstyles.
-Gave makeover.
-Being hit on at the mall. "I own a record company." "I'm a model, you know. We could model together." Bwahahah! Please, boys.
-Perverted boys honking at us and being stalked. Oh, man.
-Complimented on moi hair. Always love that!
-Asian lady on the bus. Convo goes something like this: "Are you Korean?" "Yes, I'm half and white. How can you tell?" "Oh. I have a daughter. Just like you only with long blonde hair. You're so beautiful!" "Ah, thank you." Nice woman.
Good times Maribel. ♥ xo.
Well, I'm off to wash the dye out of my hair. Visiting Valley June 3rd.
[P.S. I want my fucking camera back! I need to do some camwhoring.]
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| wet dreams? |
[28 May 2004|07:31pm] |
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mood |
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 confused |
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music |
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Kill Hannah - Unwanted |
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Ok, so this is the 286438654 time I wake up crying from my dreams.
What.The.Fuck.
I haven't been experiencing any depression or anything. I'm guessing my subconcious mind is trying to tell me something?? If so.. I would like to know! I don't get it, man. :[
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| epiphany. |
[27 May 2004|09:20am] |
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mood |
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 awake |
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Had this dream a while back. I realize how I really like this guy Rolando. He's my ex's [Daniel] best friend. [Is that so bad?] Usually, I am so undecisive and having this dream and the whole 'him taking care of me when I was drunk' situation replayed just made me think. And, I know I'm not lusting because he's such a funny, sweet guy. Now, I just need someone to let him know.
Oh, and Erick might visit soon. ::grin:: I should take him with me to Valley next week. Since he knows Rolando.
So, I dropped Eddie and he's in Texas for 2 weeks. I need to tell him there's nothing between us anymore. [Oh, boy. This is the 2nd time I'm dropping the bomb on him.] I just want to be friends. Or friends with benefits, hmm?
I'm lonely. Someone want to cuddle? ;)
P.S. Changed my layout.. go look<3
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| whores smell of raspberries. |
[19 May 2004|08:06pm] |
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mood |
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 lazy |
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music |
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HIM - Beautiful |
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Everyone should post pictures of their hipbones and make me a very happy girl.
XO.Rachel.
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| bloody hell. |
[19 May 2004|02:47am] |
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mood |
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 nauseated |
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music |
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.labored breathing. |
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I'm experiencing cramps big time. [Yes, it's that time of month again.] I can not sleep. Grrr.. I took an advil earlier and it's effects seem to be wearing off. I, also, am fortunate to have a bleeding, runny nose and constant sneezing. I have no clue if I am hungry or on the verge of vomiting. Right now, I am accompanied with lemonade iced tea, cool towel, a/c on hand, and wretched thoughts in my head.
I feel like a heated, pregnant lady about to be in labor any minute now. Okay, maybe not to that extreme but pretty damn close.
I curse you bloody rags!
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| girls just wanna have fun. |
[17 May 2004|05:32pm] |
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mood |
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 bored |
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music |
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Avenged Sevenfold - Unholy Confessions |
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Went to a Birthday party last night. Had some much needed fun. Met this cool girl Gladys. She cracks you up with her laugh. Haha, that girl will not hesitate to flip off any honking passerbys. Oh, man. Maribel and Brady were all up in each other's grill. Ate a bit and watched 'Texas Chainsaw Massacre'. Scary.
Maribel made me this cute purse.
Happy 17th, moi fashionista doll<3
There's this cute metal guy dressed in black w/ long, dirty blonde hair outside walking his little brown dog. Second time, I've seen him this week. So, I'm thinking tomorrow I will walk my poodle and bump into him "accidently".
Hey, my dog needs to relieve some stress. ;)
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